Voices In My Head #16

It's that time of the year again, finals season. So in light of the happy mood for the upcoming week, I bring you a little ray of blacklight into an otherwise boring day. A liile of this and a little more of that, I am hoping to mass produce a few more mind-numbing facts and stories to amuse and bewillder the masses. SO with out any further adu, I sit in silence and let the voices speek for themselves. *Beware of the space moose that lives in my ceiling!!!*


"It's better to be dead and cool than to be alive and uncool."

--Harley Davidson, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man (Movie)


"With heart and hand I pledge you while I load my gun again, you will never be forgotten or the enemy forgiven, my good comrade..."

--Anton LaVey, The Black Flame Vol 5 #3&4


Meanwhile.... HEY KIDS! There's this new doll out ther that's like everthing you've ever wanted! Not like those other tickel-me dolls!!! The people who made those other dolls think your mom is stupid, and if your mom actually is stupid, they probably made her that way!! Our doll has dozens more levels of response than theirs, so trample the homeless on yourway to get..... TICKLE ME HELLMO!!!

Level 1: Hellmo gigles when squeezed!
Level 2: Vibrates with glee!
Level 3: Hellmo begins to question the nature of the relationship "Why do you keep touching me?"
Level 4: Uses guilt as a diversionary tactic "Aww, look whatcha did! Hadda squeeze me didn't ya?" as he spits blood.
Level 5: Pokes you with a sharp stick.
Level 6: Secretes substace that induces a vicious rash and temporary blindness.
Level 7: Starts reciting Goth poetry
Level 8: Alters child's taste buds so that everything tastes like pork.
Level 9: Pronged bolts pop out from Hellmo's sides, releasing only after consciousness fails!
Level 10: Utilizing injected Nano-Technology, Hellmo causes severe neurological damage.
Level 11: Summons local monkeys to brutalize child.
Level 12: Hellmo calls upon his lord Satan, to stare at child at bedtime.
Level 13: Hypnotizes child into admitting to parents about alternative lifestyle (Child as dominatrix)
Level 14: For the "Wired" child, internal modem uses juniors E-Mail address to threaten the President
Level 15: Hellmo's feet explode with deadly shrapnel, obliterating little Jorge's nether regions.
Level 16: Re-enacts the tourture seen from Reservoir Dogs.
Level 17: Forces child to watch as he brings about the collapse of the civilized world.
Level 18: Teleports Ninja stars into your intestines!! (Child in bathroom, screaming)
Level 19: Fire Ants!!!
Level 20: We won't spoil the fun for you! find out for yourself!!!
TICKLE-ME HELLMO! IT'S THE DOLL ALL THE KIDS ARE SCREAMING ABOUT!!

--SQUEE! #1 (FROM THE MAKERS ON JOHNNY THE HOMICIADAL MANIAC)

---AND NOW SPENDING TIME WITH *HAPPY NOODLE BOY*---

Somewhere, not in a grocery store, a day begins!!!

Lady: Oh my God!! Not the lawn Gnome!!!
HNB: YOU IS MY ELF-HO!!! (picture not included)

You remember this lesson I teach you! Use it for good!!! Use it on nachos!!! Hangnail !!

Eggy-weggy, oh so bright!! Eggy-weggy...Fuck you Satan!! I eat your tuna!! Size six my ass!!!

Be free, little pop-tart. (tossing baby over a cliff)

------------------------------------------------------------------

The me that you know, had some second thoughts
he's covered with scabs, he is broken and sore
The me that you know, doesn't come around much
that part of me, isn't here anymore

NIN, the becoming


I'm off now to finish the task of completing the evil home work assignment (the last ever) until next time...